This Could Only Happen To Me {For Reals}

This Could Only Happen To Me {For Reals}

I would like to start off by telling everyone that I am not excessively¬†clumsy. I was not drinking the day when this story begins (at least not excessively). I don’t usually jump up out of my chair to do yard work (at least not excessively). We can now¬†proceed....